With mothers being on our minds this week, here are a few thoughts on being a happier mum, starting with a quote from Jackie Hall (Mum, and author of “The Happy Mum Handbook“):
“I threw a loaf of bread across the room and slammed a nearby bread knife on the kitchen bench so hard that it bounced off the bench and narrowly missed my son’s head. I screamed, “I HATE MY LIFE” and ran out of the kitchen into my bedroom crying uncontrollably…
My life had become a repetitive cycle of getting angry, losing the plot, feeling guilty and then hating myself for behaving this way… I realised that no fairy godmother was going to come out and wave her magic wand and suddenly make me happy.
So who else could by my advocate for change?
The answer was: Only I could.”
She is right – change comes from within. A good catalyst for change, like a life-coach or a good self-help book, can help us to move forward. But ultimately we change because of our own strong desire to do so.
Mums that come to me for coaching often feel that making changes to become happier is essential for them – after all, how can you hope to raise happy children if you don’t know how to be a happy yourself?
There are lots of things one can do to feel happier, but here are a couple to get you started.
Give your body the gift of Exercise:
This week is a great time for mums to review their health goals and access to exercise opportunities. Regular, fun exercise is an essential part of living healthier lives, not least because it lifts our mood and makes us feel happier.
Here’s a link to a great article about getting more active to feel healthier, a “prescription for women’s wellness”:
Give your mind the gift of thinking about how to be happier:
If coaching isn’t an option for you at the moment, then you can get some ideas about being a happier mum from the book “How to be a Happy Mum”, written by Siobhan Freegard of http://www.netmums.com
The book identifies the top 10 stresses mothers have to cope with and looks at how to overcome them to find greater happiness at home. You can buy the book here:
(I should say that I make no financial gain from you buying it – I am recommending it because a couple of my clients have found it helpful!)
Give yourself the gift of time:
Before the walls close in and you start gasping for child-free air, make time for yourself to have a break from the kids. Take a walk. Go for coffee with a friend. Talk to some adults! Read a book. Do something you used to do before you had children, but have let slip. Spend some quality time with your partner, to nurture that relationship.
Also, work out how best to manage your time so that you can get the most out of each day, whilst meeting your own needs as well as those of your family.
Tell me what you think – share what you have done to help / give to people, and how you felt afterwards – it’s great to hear your experiences, and I feature some of them in my newsletters.
Leave a comment here, or email me: Mary@Coach-me-Happy.co.uk